Letting Go Slowly

frever_forgetme @ 2005-05-25T11:12:00

2005-05-25T16:15:48Z

guess what dolls.. my livejournal has been being absolutly retarded lately so i had to get a new one.. ya its kinda sad.. lol heres my new eljay..

dichthe_logical

add me.. im gonna be having a friends cut on the new eljay.. muah

frever_forgetme @ 2005-05-19T15:55:00

2005-05-19T20:56:06Z

Friends Cut! Comment to stay added loves..

frever_forgetme @ 2005-02-13T19:49:00

2005-02-14T01:50:45Z

im gonna jump on the bandwagon and do the anonymous thing (sorry the spelling) haha Post anything that you want, but make sure you post it anonymously. [Or not, whatever you prefer.] A story, something about me, a secret, a confession, a fear, a love - anything. Be sure to post anonymously and honestly. Post more than once, if you like/want to. Then, put this in your LJ to see what your friends (and perhaps others who you don't even realise read your LJ) have to say.

frever_forgetme @ 2004-10-28T16:42:00

2004-10-28T21:43:44Z

Friends Only

comment if you want to be added!!

frever_forgetme @ 2004-10-22T20:09:00

2004-10-23T01:24:45Z

Well im so fucking tired! Today was such a good day.. i have no idea why but i wasnt depressed at all. hehe. I like this sophmore named Matt in my foods class.. i have had a crush on him for a while but i just realized how adorable he is today. lol. I was telling him how i hated my lunch period and hes like "What lunch period do you have?" I told him 5th and hes like o you should come sit with me.. hahaha i was like omg i will can i rape you while im at it!! hahaha. anyway i have saturday school tomarrow for 4 hourse.. from 8 to 12. hehe im actually not that mad anymore because im gonna have Jaryn, Michelle, and Brinny with me.. and hopefully Ilana if she goes. hehe i dunno what im gonna do but hopefully they will let us talk and shit. Im gonna pick up lovely Michelle tomarrow morning and then head on over to hell whole. I'm gonna bring a coloring book.. hahaha. Well im gonna go to bed cuz im so tired and usually on Saturdays i sleep in till 1 oclock.. ya not this time.. love always.. *~*Katie*~*

frever_forgetme @ 2004-10-21T19:00:00

2004-10-22T00:06:08Z

I miss Liz more than anything in the entire world. I can't stop crying. I didnt get to say goodbye.. and its over. i cant believe it. I always just think shes gonna yell something in Spanish but shes not there anymore. omg im crying again. I cant take this. My mom wants me to go to Central to get away from all this shit.. but i cant do that. I just wish that Liz would come home. She left me a message and i got it today.. and shes just like i love you katie.. goodbye.. and i couldnt hold it in. It sucks. i was crying today and i was wearing her sweatshirt.. i know that everyone is hurting. I ditched school yesterday so i got a 4 hour saturday school this weekend.. joy. Mr. Konrad was cool about it.. but i told him that my friend moved and i started crying and hes like "Lizzie?" Im like ya.. and he said that our whole freshman class was having a hard time with it. That just shows you liz how much we all love you. Kevin is takin it hard.. he was trying to be strong when i was crying but it was hard. God DAmn nuthin is getting easier.. just harder.

Your gone, nothing left but your name
I wont see you for a long while
I miss you more than anything
I love you so much, until next time i see you smile...

frever_forgetme @ 2004-10-19T22:59:00

2004-10-20T04:01:37Z

Liz is moving.. i didnt know. I knew there was a chance but omg. im fucking bawling my eyes out.. i dont know wat to do. i need her here. o god.. help me!

frever_forgetme @ 2004-10-18T21:45:00

2004-10-19T02:50:14Z

Blurrg. lol. bored out of my mind and annnnoyed. Havent been eating much latly.. my stomach cant keep it down. Lara says i need to eat bread and water.. so i promised i would. Other news.. there is none. I've had the same feelings about something for the LONGEST time and they wont go away so i have decided not to push them away to just let them stay there until they come in handy for sum reason. Them there hurts me but mayb in the end it will be worth it. I still have homework.. tonite totally just went by.. prolly from laughing with Mikaela.. finally i laughed. anyway, boys.. what can ya do. lol. sum1 once told me.. dont fight off the feelings, join them and see where they lead you. that doesnt really make sense but o well.. im out for the night hopefully to bed but i got shit loads of homework to do.. *katie* xoxo

frever_forgetme @ 2004-10-18T19:18:00

2004-10-19T00:35:59Z

Today was an OK day.. boring as usual, with the ocassional sadness. o well. Josh and i broke up tonite.. it wasnt working out. I hear a lot of things about people but im deciding that im gonna just listen to myself. hehe! Bre made me smile today in Foods.. woopdeedoo. Anyway, hallllooooowweeeeen. Mikaela and i decided the whole fireman thing wasnt gonna work out so we are gonna be PuNKs. lol.. i have no idea how it came about o well. I'm tryin to study for a stupid math test but im not doin very good... o well ill update later..

frever_forgetme @ 2004-10-17T17:31:00

2004-10-17T22:37:04Z

very very sick! and its totally fuckin sucks!! i hate it!! blahh.. everything is stupid. a lot of people are depressed. i dunno. i wish it was all easy.

frever_forgetme @ 2004-10-17T13:23:00

2004-10-17T18:24:42Z

Weird mood.. im so sick. it hurts to talk and i have a headache.. i cant breath out of my nose.. haha its horrible. anywa last night was all crying.. mikaela toooooo... its otay now i guess tho. today i have church yay with lara.. even tho i feel like shit. laras surprise party was a blaaaaaast. hehe BINGO!!!! twister moves. haha. anyway im just layin around today trying to feel a bit betta..

frever_forgetme @ 2004-10-17T00:07:00

2004-10-17T05:16:05Z

We were s'posed to be friends forever
No matter what happened..
Being more than friends wasnt s'posed to change us
You promisd.. we would be there for eachother in the end

Guys are the same.. there are no exceptions
I really wish i could say thir are..
And i wish that i could say you were the exception
But no, dont worry you still get an award, for breaking my heart

The worst is over now
I hope from now on its total bliss
i dont think i can take anymore tears you make fall from my eyes
because next time its gonna blood from my wrists :-[
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I want it all back
Spraying to much perfume in the girls bathroom
having food fights with the people across from us
The monday gloom

I want it all back
Laughing at lunch
Being with Adam again
Giving STeve and Ryan a punch

I want it all back
Our rock wall
Ian and me
Everytime that i took a fall

I want it all back
Evertime I kissed him
Everytime he told me he loved me
And everytime teacher gave me an ugly grin

But most of all
I want the days were i knew who i loved
I want the days were i was so safe, i knew who i was
I would do anything to live one more day at Washington
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

*MY heart is telling me that you could be my meant to be.. i know it more each time we touch, cuz.. something happens when you look at me i forget to speak, somethin happens when you kiss my mouth my knees get so weak, could it be true this is wat god has meant for me.. that something like you could happen to me. something magical, something spirtual, something stronger thant he two of us alone.. something physical. something undeniable.. nothin like antyhing that ive ever known..** N'Sync (dont make fun im crying)

~*~Cuz its all in my head, i think about it over and over again i cant keep picturin you with him, it hurts so bad.. cuz i think about it over and over again, i replay it over and over again, i cant take it, i cant shake it. i remeber the day you left, i remeber the last breath you took right in front of me. now that i realize that im goin down, from allt his pain you put me through, everytime i close my eyes i lock it down.. i cant go on without lovin you~*~ Nelly ft. Tim McGraw

Wow am i depressed. Mikaela only understands.. God help me..

frever_forgetme @ 2004-10-16T22:59:00

2004-10-17T04:04:23Z

blahhh retarded moood! i dunno im so confused about everything. i seriously am thinking bout ian.. blurr i wish it was easy.. i wish that it was junior high again..

frever_forgetme @ 2004-10-16T15:04:00

2004-10-16T20:10:17Z

Nick fucking broke up with Jessica last night.!!! and the fucking north game in front of everyone!!!! HES SUCH A DICK!!!!!!!!! I HATE HIM. she went home crying. i couldnt believe him. It was freezing last night.. Josh made it better tho. lol. OMG! Ian was with his little friends and the new love interest.. and all of a sudden i hear him like loudly say.. i know i wasted two years of my life.. ! my heart just fucking stopped and i started to cry. i couldnt believe him. Mikaela started crying because i was crying. so im like fuck him. i went up to josh, we were right behind ian, and i SCREAMED.."I WASTED TWO YEARS OF MY FUCKING LIFE" and i looked at Josh and kissed him. Mikaela said that Ian like turned his head towards me and looked so confused and sad. im like good he deserved it. Anyway.. today is SWEETEST DAY ya'll and Josh came over to give me a teddy bear and a box of chocolates.. haha sooooo cute.. even tho i just woke up and i wasnt even like ready. lol. Well today is Lara's partayyyy so im so excited.. but im gonna hang with Josh for a lil while hehe. i <3 that kid. alrite im out!

frever_forgetme @ 2004-10-15T10:17:00

2004-10-15T15:23:47Z

Ok yesterday was a normal day.. im over Jordan. I have to be. Josh asked me out yesterday and i said yes. lol. funnnny. then jordan finally talks to me last night and is like."so i heard your over me eh?" im like ya i guess... you dont talk to me.. you ignore me. and hes like "i just wanted you to see that there is more for you out there than me" im like i didnt want anyone else. his depression is really bad so i told him i understand because i have it to.. i think its ok now. but ya o well.. i know who told him... that i was over him.. blah. that pisses me off. anyway i stayed home from school today.. because im sick a a fuckin dog. my throat hurts like hellllls. north game tonite.. i hope i feel better so that i can go. hmm lets see anything else.. noope... back to lifeee.. haha actually i have homework to do that i didnt do last night..

frever_forgetme @ 2004-10-13T18:15:00

2004-10-13T23:17:21Z

Ya ok.. depressed again as usual. wat else is new. ok was alrite.. nothin special happened. Im seriously close to being over Jordan. i cant deal with him not talking to me.. and then talking to me when he wants to. thats bs. and im not gonna just be his bitch.. which i know i am right now. i need to just let go.. nothin new.. later tonite ill prolly have shit to talk about.. not that any1 would want to listen to me whine..

frever_forgetme @ 2004-10-12T21:11:00

2004-10-13T02:14:17Z

ok.. the worst depressed mood today. im a bit better now.. but i just wanted to cry the entire day. blahh.. i dunno wat as wrong with me.. but it sucked.. and it still does. i lost my fitness plan so i have to do another because stupid me didnt save it.. ya im a fuckin retard. ill write later when im in a better mood.. interesting thing that happened today.. josh asked me to have sex with him.. (pulls out condom, gets on one kneeee) o lord that made me smile for about a second...

frever_forgetme @ 2004-10-11T18:25:00

2004-10-11T23:29:10Z

FIREFIGHTER FOR HALLOWEEN!!! Red overalls' tight yellow tank top underneath. lol. loose over tight. sexxxxxay. hahaha anyway i went to mikis today and we listened to halloween music, made decorations for her room, and we were so hungry for howies pizza.. so we hate pretzels with parmazan cheese and pizza sauce.. haha it actually tasted good. anyway.. mikaela came over to my house and made a bracelt.. didnt finish it tho. and then sadly went home cuz she forgot about dinner.. haha. i miss jordan.. yes shut up i do. school tomarrow.. so nice outside.. a lil NIPPY but still. it would be better to have sum1 to cuddle with outside. hehe. any1 want to be a sexxy firefighter with us for halloween?? haha. me and mikaela.. *muah*

frever_forgetme @ 2004-10-11T18:23:00

2004-10-11T23:24:26Z

Ask me 3 questions, anything you want, and I will answer them honestly. Post this in your LJ and allow your friends to ask you 3 questions that you must answer honestly.
HAHA STOLE FROM BRE!! please comment tho... not many did on my annomous.. just my love bre.

frever_forgetme @ 2004-10-10T22:11:00

2004-10-11T03:17:03Z

im in a really really depressed mood! i miss bre.. i wnated to chill with her today.. but of course not nothin works out. i went to church.. and i was thinking and sum stuff i dont agree with.. like always coming to God. I dont think that you should come to God with EVERYTHING. Cuz then i feel like you just come to because you feel like its the right thing to do, and if all you do is depend on God, then when it doesnt work out (which it wont) your gonna resent him. and i dont want to do that. and i want to have faith in myself to be able to fix my problems. I dunno.. and in Ancient History.. like we are being taught how humans were like "apes" and stuff... and my teacher is like saying how this one thing happened, known as something from the bible, or this person, known as noah! im like.. no it was noah or etc. it just has been bothering me. im in a stupid mood and im annoyed.. and i need God. blah.. i just want to completly cry right now. No school tomarrow.. good deal.. who wants to hang out? i gotta get outta my house. Alrite enough with my blabbin..

P.S. I miss him.. i dont want to!

frever_forgetme @ 2004-10-09T22:29:00

2004-10-10T03:36:06Z

I went over to Jordan's today. I really need to stop doing this to myself. im really sad right now.. i dunno i came home and i was depressed out of my mind.. blah.. I just cant stop cryin, i hate this!! Ok im really freaking myself out.. i DONT want another ian. i need to just stop this right now..

frever_forgetme @ 2004-10-09T19:49:00

2004-10-10T00:49:26Z

Post anything you want about me, but post it anonymously. Post anything: a secret, a confession, a fear, a love, your opinion about me...anything, but be sure to post anonymously and honestly. Then put this in your own LJ so you can see what others have to say to you.

frever_forgetme @ 2004-10-08T23:39:00

2004-10-09T04:41:16Z

I went downtown with Mikaela, Andrew, and Josh. interesting.. nough' said. ya you all know who im thinking bout. im tired.. night night. oo i talked to adam!!!!!!!!!!!! im so happy i miss that kid so much. and i talked to ian. awkward.. ill tell you all later! haha.

frever_forgetme @ 2004-10-08T14:21:00

2004-10-08T19:24:48Z

Slept over at Kimmys last night.. hehe fun times. Came home whis morning.. im supposed to go over to Jordans today, but of course i dont have a ride anywhere, so i have to wait until my stepdad gets home, and then pray to god that hes in a really good mood, and will drive me to his house. but then i have to cal him and blah blah.. yes i miss him shut up. i got a new sn. dashboardC 67... i stayed home from school yesterday because i threw up in the morning. Its gloomy outside.. im bored, and now im gloomy because of the dark clouds. ughhh..... i have NOTHING TO DO! i was supposed to go over to mikaelas, but i fell asleep.. so ugh. ok im done complainging.. good bye cruel world.. haha i have never said that before..

frever_forgetme @ 2004-10-06T23:02:00

2004-10-07T04:04:04Z

finished my stupid ass fitness plan. thankgod. talked to jordan, i miss that kid. hehe. josh wants me to wear his soccer jersey thing tomarrow.. wow im gonna have an interesting day. i finished all that stupid ass homework, thankgod. im off to bed.. still tired even after my nap. love always..